7 Big Reasons Gen-Z Women Are Noping Out Of Dating
Gen-Z women don’t discuss their decision to avoid dating for a variety of reasons. Some don’t want to be derided. Some are exhausted by dating apps.
Others just feel too hurt by previous experiences to try again. Even more feel like everyone around them will try to convince them otherwise, despite them having their mind made up.
Here are the big reasons Gen-Z women are noping out of dating:
1. A lack of decent options
Honestly? Men won’t like my answer. I’m prepared for the hate I’ll get my way. The reason most women quit dating is men don’t seem to want to behave like decent people, as supported by a study in the Journal of Interpersonal Violence. I wish I could say it’s something else. I wish I could say it’s because girls chase after the wrong guys, but it’s very clearly systemic.
I mean, look at the situation that women face in the dating scene. It’s not surprising many women are traumatized and afraid to approach men. Heck, even accepting dates is a bit scary for those of us who aren’t “done.”
2. Dating apps stink
It’s no secret that women have a bad time on dating apps. Women constantly have to face crude harassment from men in the form of lewd messages and unsolicited pictures.
Contrary to popular belief, it’s not as easy as “just be cute and guys will hit on you.” It’s just bad. Romance is kind of dead. Getting guys to pay for a dinner date feels about as easy as pulling a cow up a tree.
3. Too many men have too little to offer
The market for a decent life partner is beyond slim, and most men who hit women up dangle a wedding ring like a carrot on a stick. Some will allow themselves to live with women for decades, with no commitment on their end. Women don’t want that. They want a real companion.
Women have to deal with men who expect access to their bodies all the time with little in terms of affection, commitment, money, or even enjoyment in return. It’s become the norm, and women are getting tired of it. They do not want to be a “ride or die” for someone who will throw them under the bus in a heartbeat.
If a woman asks for a man to pay for a dinner, he might wax poetic about how she was “hustling him for money.”
Ladies are starting to realize that most marriages are a raw deal. If a relationship does progress, women will categorically work more at home than men — despite also being increasingly expected to have a job.
So what would a woman gain from wading through 100 entitled men who won’t even pay for a coffee? A chance at the rare guy who’s worth it? After a certain amount of rejection, it’s easy to see why women don’t want to invest time into finding Mr. Right anymore.
4. Bad experiences
Most women I know end up having at least two men refuse to take them on proper dates, “accidentally” bring up a fancy restaurant they suddenly can’t afford, or worse, “lose their wallet” at said venue.
Men laugh about putting in minimal effort to get a woman to sleep with them. At times, women find themselves stigmatized by a “player” who made sure to tell everyone they slept with them. Sometimes, a handful of bad boyfriends is enough to have women say they’re done.
The negging, the poking at women, the way men pick them apart, and the way women always get scolded for speaking up about the way they get treated are pretty horrible. I would say it’s traumatic.
When I dealt with this kind of stuff, I had a period when I said that I wouldn’t date again. While I may have changed my mind when I met my spouse, women are totally within their right to choose to stay single out of fear for their own safety and mental health.
5. No need for a partner
Women who want families have the opportunity to have children whenever they want. A fertility clinic is just a call away. Women can have their jobs. They can also nurture their entire social lives.
In the past, women were not given a way to support themselves. Their entire status depended on who they married. This is no longer the case, and the stigma towards singledom is starting to fade.
6. Dating fatigue
I’ll let you in on a secret that’s not being televised too frequently: Women are getting fed up with men — often to the point they wash their hands of even trying to get a relationship.
It’s not just my observation, either. According to Pew Research and other sources, women are increasingly choosing to stay single rather than date or marry a man. This is particularly true for women over 30 who experience dating fatigue as well as women who have already divorced once.
If you haven’t been hearing the news, I can give you a good explanation for that. Most women don’t talk about their decision to avoid men altogether. They just do it. A switch clicks in their mind, and from that day on, they plan a life around being single.
7. Dating isn’t enjoyable
What now? Honestly, I don’t know. I do not expect the men pushing women to quit dating to empathize with ladies. If the 4B movement in Korea takes hold in America, we’re going to see more and more women choosing singledom for the rest of their lives.
Is this a bad thing? To a point, yes. Many women will mourn the lives they looked forward to that never came. So will a lot of men who end up perma-single because their Ms. Right gave up before they met them.
However, I try to be hopeful. Maybe this is the push we need to turn dating into something enjoyable again. Or maybe it’ll be the reason that makes people realize that being alone is better than being with the wrong person. Who knows?