Lighthearted: Please-ing isn’t pleasing

Have you ever been spoken to, or received an email or message that has an overdose of the word please?

Honestly, how did it make you feel? Did you feel respected, irritated, put off or mocked? If you haven’t received anything like it before, that’s fine, but how you would react to a please-ful message or email like this:

“Please, good morning. Can you please finish the report by the close of the day and forward it to Mrs Erzuah, please? Please make sure you cross-check the figures to ensure that they are the ones we discussed with the planning team, please. Please remember it is very important.
Thank you, please.”

Please, in every sentence? So clunky! It wears me out, pretty overwhelming and forced, if you asked me, and I don’t think I am alone.

Using please is a sign of being well-mannered. It is an absolutely courteous quality, but its excessive use can be as unpleasant as no use of it. It suggests some amount of insincerity, as if to say that the one using it wants to please people. You don’t want to be thought of as insincere, do you?

If please is used for every request, it comes across as a mere formality, and so it is more mechanical than it is a sincere expression of courtesy.

What else does too much use of please do? It sometimes conveys little or no confidence, making you appear less assertive. This might decrease the likelihood of your requests being granted. As well, in roles where assertiveness is a key requirement, the excessive use of ‘please’ can make it difficult for people to see you as a decisive leader.

Why should we say please when we are greeting people? If you won’t say: please happy birthday or please Merry Christmas, why would you add please to a greeting when they are both good wishes?

Too much of everything is not good, and so is the overuse of please. It is not good. It robs it of its genuineness.

Use please the proper way to convey the sincerity of your communication. Be true, be you, please no one, and let your politeness mean politeness and nothing else.

Let’s see if we can redo the text that had a thousand and one ‘please’s.

“Good morning, Abrima. Could you finish the report by the close of the day and forward it to Mrs Erzuah? It’s urgent. Please cross-check the figures to ensure that they are the ones we discussed with the planning team. Thanks a lot, Abrima!”

This is my version. You could make your version too and let it have your style. Each time you type an mail, read it again and ensure that it doesn’t have any fake flavour before you send it.

Please have a good day. I’m winking away, please
Cheers please!