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Self-examination questions before marriage

1. Has your background being similar to that of the person you want to marry? Similar living environment, religious affiliation, financial status, and social standing tend toward an easier marital adjustment. Dissimilar backgrounds tend to prolong the period of marital adjustment.

2. Have you maintained friendly relations with your parents if they are alive? Your chances of marital happiness are better if the answer is definitely yes.

3. Was your parents marriage a success? If the answer is no, you may not understand just what it takes to make a happy home. The person who is reared in a divided home, however, has had an opportunity to observe the tragedy of disharmony, and may have developed such a strong determination to establish a happy home of his own as to offset the disadvantages of his unfortunate childhood experience.

4. When spending time with the person you expect to marry, does your conversation run along lines of mutual interest and common goals?

5. Have you avoided making mental reservations with respect to your proposed marriage? The person who tries to keep his partner ignorant of facts pertaining to himself or herself is running a definite risk of marital disharmony. It is better to inform each other completely, even at the risk of a broken engagement, than to run the risk of misunderstandings after marriage.

6. Will you be willing to defer to your husband or wife rather than develop a misunderstanding? There are times when marital harmony demands a willingness to go more than halfway in order to give your partner the benefit of the doubt.

7. Are you willing that provision be made for free discussion of problems of common interests?

8. Have you met the parents of your spouse-to-be and are you willing to assume the responsibilities of a daughter-in-law or a son-in-law should these responsibilities come your way? If you intend to make reservations in this matter, such reservations should be frankly discussed before marriage.

If the above questions can honestly be answered in the affirmative, then you need not hesitate to offer yourself in marriage. From your own standpoint, you are playing your part to ensure marital adjustment.

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