A Little Laugher Can Be a Great Equalizer
There is a fabulous quote often repeated by country singer and songwriter Reba McEntire, “To succeed in life you need three things: a wishbone, a backbone and a funny bone.”
Working women need aspirations and goals to advance in their careers. Our wishbone fuels us with motivation and focus for our future. Visualizations of our dreams and wishes can put us on the fast track to achieving them.
But we also need a backbone. How many times have you been speechless in an awkward situation and later think of fifty things you wish you had said?
Having a strong backbone calls for courage to stand your ground even when it feels scary. It calls for being present to the situation at hand and responding to an inappropriate comment quickly.
Doesn’t everyone like a good laugh? Our funny bone can help us use humor as a great way to respond to an outrageous or otherwise inappropriate comment made by a male colleague.
But you must be quick on your feet and have the courage to speak up. On the receiving end, humor can be humbling; on the giving end, it can be empowering. Trust your instincts and if a thought pops into your head, let it out and just go with it.
The Quick-Comeback Response
Here are a couple of examples of real-life workplace situations from women on the front lines and how they responded with humor.
Situation: Something inappropriate is said to you, often in front of others.
Story #1: Susan was at a weekend strategic planning retreat with colleagues around the country when she lost an expensive earring. At the break, she began to search for it and others joined in to help. They began to trace her steps in hopes of finding her earring. As they were waiting at the elevator to continue their search, a male colleague walked up and asked what was going on. When he found out, he immediately said, “Oh, I have her earring. I found it on my pillow this morning.” She immediately replied, “You wish!”
Why this works: She used humor as a comeback to his funny but inappropriate remark. She left no doubt in people’s minds that what he said happened did not actually happen. And she drew a boundary line in the sand, gaining everyone’s respect, including the man who made the remark.
Story #2: Rachel accompanied Phil, her sales manager, to a presentation he was making to one of his customers. When they walked into the meeting, the CEO immediately greeted Rachel’s colleague and in front of about twenty people said, “Why did you bring her, for looks?” Rachel walked over and patted the CEO on his derriere and said, “Oh, I thought that was why you were here, honey.”
Why this works: She took control of the awkward situation and had the backbone to act. The CEO laughed along with everyone else. He expressed humility, she was empowered (along with the other women in the room), and they had a successful meeting.
Humor has a positive impact at work. From reducing stress and improving productivity to fostering rapport and enhancing problem-solving, a splash of laughter can create a happier workplace.
Alison Beard, executive editor of the Harvard Business Review, in her article, “Leading with Humor,” states, “According to research from institutions as serious as Wharton, MIT, and London Business School, every chuckle or guffaw brings with it a host of business benefits. Laughter relieves stress and boredom, boosts engagement and well-being, and spurs not only creativity and collaboration but also analytic precision and productivity.”
Give your funny bone a try. Add humor to your toolbox of responses to inappropriate, awkward, and sexist comments you may experience at work. A speedy, well-delivered comeback will leave you—and others—smiling.