5 Signs you’re obsessed with your Ex

Moving on from a relationship after a breakup can be difficult, and it’s natural to feel attached to an ex afterward.

However, sometimes these feelings can linger a little too long, becoming an obsession, which holds you back from healing and makes it hard to move on and find happiness.

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If you’re wondering if you’ve reached this point, here are some signs that you might be obsessed with your ex.

1) Constantly checking their social media
Are you always scrolling through their Instagram, X (formerly Twitter), or Facebook feed, trying to figure out what they’re doing or who they’re with? Obsessively monitoring an ex’s social media is a strong sign you’re still emotionally attached. This behaviour only fuels your obsession, keeping you mentally invested in their life. To help stop this, try to limit your social media usage or, if possible, consider blocking or muting their profile temporarily. This can give you the chance to detach and focus on yourself.

2) Comparing new relationships to your Ex
If you find yourself comparing every new romantic interest to your ex, you might still be emotionally invested. This kind of comparison can prevent you from truly appreciating someone new for who they are.

To break this habit, remind yourself that every person is unique and brings different qualities. Give new relationships a fair chance without comparisons.

3) Talking about them constantly
Another sign that you might be obsessed with your ex is frequently bringing up their name in conversations with friends and family. Talking about your ex regularly, even in passing, shows that they’re still on your mind, which can hinder you from moving on.

To reduce this, try to be mindful of how often you mention them. Make a conscious effort to shift the conversation to other topics.

4) Holding onto their belongings
If you’re keeping their things around as “souvenirs” or reminders, it may indicate that you’re unwilling to fully let go. These items can act as anchors to your past relationship, making it hard to embrace new beginnings.

Consider returning, donating, or discarding these items. Freeing up physical space can also create mental and emotional space.

5) Frequent contact or attempts to reconnect

Do you find yourself always texting or calling them? Or perhaps you’re “accidentally” bumping into them at their favourite spots? If you’re making efforts to stay connected, it’s a sign you’re struggling to move on. You might also find yourself asking mutual friends how your ex is doing or subtly inquiring about their personal life.

Doing any of the above suggests that you’re not ready to let go. Setting boundaries with yourself around contact can help. Give yourself a set period without any contact to help break the attachment.

If you recognise any of these signs, it’s important to acknowledge that it’s time to move on. Give yourself the time and space to process these feelings, and remember that you deserve a fresh start. Letting go may take time, but with patience and self-care, you’ll be on the path to rediscovering yourself.