8 topics to avoid talking about on a first date
First dates are supposed to be fun and light.
They’re an opportunity to start to get to know someone new and figure out if you’d like to see them again and maybe get a little deeper.
In other words, first dates are not the time for you and your crush to feel depressed about what’s going on in the news or tackle heavy topics that can put a damper on the fun.
With that in mind, here are 8 topics that should be off the table on the first date.
- Too much information about your ex
While it’s cool to touch on the subject of exes with information on how long you’ve been single and what caused the end of your previous relationship, you don’t want to get too stuck on the subject. It can make your date feel like you’re not over the past or that you’re drilling them about theirs. Give a basic overview and then move on.
- Anything to do with politics
When the topic of politics comes up, this can cause people to become passionate or angry and even clash over their different opinions. Not a good thing on a first date. Plus, it’s kind of boring. You’ve presumably established you’re not at entirely opposite ends of the spectrum before you’ve even met up, so why get into the nitty-gritty so soon?
- All things sexual
You might want to have sex on the first date and that’s cool if it feels right, but talking about sex can be a little too much too soon. You want to make sure that you have other things in common besides an attraction to each other and you want to suss out a deeper connection.
- Money problems and/or your earning
Wait, is this a job interview? Who talks about money on the first date? If you’re discussing things like your income or how bad your debt is, this can make the date feel too heavy. Plus, why give so much private information about yourself right away?
- Your ideas about religion
This should be avoided for pretty much the same reasons as to why you’d avoid getting elbow-deep into politics: it’s sensitive and can lead to arguments.
- Your deal breakers
While it’s great to talk about what you’re looking for in a relationship, it might be a bit too much to give each other a list of your deal-breakers. It can feel daunting like you’ve got a whole list of things that they’d better not do – and you don’t even know each other yet!
- Family trauma and drama
It’s good to get to know more about the person you’re dating and what type of family they have. It gives you some insight into who they are, but now’s not the time to talk about family issues and drama. This is a first date, not a session with a psychologist!
- You need to get married
Maybe you can see that you and the guy are on the same page when it comes to what you’re looking for in a relationship, but don’t get ahead of yourself by talking about marriage, how much you want to have a big wedding, and so on. That should only come later when you know each other.