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5 signs you’ll see if a girl is just using you

Recognising these signs early on can save you from emotional distress and wasted time.

You meet this amazing girl, butterflies erupt in your stomach, and suddenly you’re picturing fireworks and happily ever after.

But hold on a sec, before you write a song about her or name your firstborn after her favourite celebrity, let’s pump the brakes a bit. Sometimes, those butterflies might be more like warning signs.

This isn’t about scaring you off, but about recognising when someone might not be as invested as you are.

Here are 5 signs that she might be using you, and why it’s totally okay to walk away and find someone who appreciates you for the awesome guy you are.

1. She only reaches out when she needs something

One of the most obvious signs is that she only contacts you when she needs a favour or help.

She only reaches out when she needs something [USC]

Whether it’s borrowing money, getting a ride, or needing someone to vent to, her calls and messages are usually driven by a specific need. If you notice that she disappears when everything is fine but suddenly reappears when she needs something, it’s a red flag​​.

A girl who is using you will try to manipulate and control your actions. She might use emotional blackmail, guilt-tripping, or even play the victim to get what she wants.

She manipulates and controls you [EbonyMagazine]

This behaviour is a clear indication that she is more interested in fulfilling her own needs than in caring for you or your feelings​​.

If a girl is genuinely interested in you, she would want to introduce you to her friends and family. However, if she avoids this or makes excuses whenever the topic comes up, it could be a sign that she’s not serious about the relationship. She might be trying to keep you at a distance or not want others to see how she’s using you​.

She always does things on her terms [StephanSpeaks]

Another sign is that everything in the relationship happens according to her terms. She makes plans that suit her and expects you to comply. Your opinions and desires are often sidelined, and compromises always seem to be one-sided. If she is never willing to meet you halfway or consider your preferences, she might be using you to satisfy her own wants​.

A lack of emotional connection is a major indicator that she’s using you. She might not show interest in your life, your feelings, or your needs. Conversations are mostly one-sided, focusing mainly on her issues and desires. If she never asks about your day, your feelings, or your problems, it’s a sign that she’s not emotionally invested in the relationship.

Recognising these signs early on can save you from emotional distress and wasted time. Relationships should be built on mutual respect, care, and emotional connection.

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