5 clear signs a guy doesn’t know what he wants

In relationships, it can be frustrating and confusing when someone sends mixed signals, especially when you’re trying to figure out if your partner is serious about the future.

Sometimes, a guy may genuinely be unsure about what he wants, which can cause emotional turmoil for both parties.

Here are five clear signs that a guy might not know what he wants, and how recognizing them can help you make informed decisions about your relationship.

One of the most common signs that a guy doesn’t know what he wants is erratic or inconsistent communication. One day he might be texting and calling frequently, showing a lot of interest, and the next day he might disappear or barely respond to messages. This on-and-off behaviour can leave you feeling confused and unsure of where you stand. It’s a clear indicator that he might not be fully invested or is struggling with his own feelings about the relationship.

If a guy continuously avoids having serious conversations about the future of your relationship, it’s a red flag that he might not be ready for commitment.

When you try to bring up topics like defining the relationship, making long-term plans, or discussing future goals, and he constantly changes the subject or gives vague answers, it’s a sign that he’s unsure about what he truly wants. This avoidance can prevent the relationship from moving forward and leave you feeling stuck.

Pay attention to the language he uses when discussing the relationship. Phrases like “let’s see how things go,” “I’m not sure,” or “maybe” suggest that he’s hesitant to fully commit. Non-committal language often reflects inner uncertainty, and while he may not mean to string you along, it shows that he’s not ready to make any concrete decisions about your future together. This can lead to frustration as you wait for clarity that may never come.

Emotional instability, such as frequent mood swings or fluctuating behaviour toward you, can be another indicator that a guy doesn’t know what he wants.

Another clear sign is his hesitation or refusal to make future plans, whether it’s something as simple as a date next weekend or larger commitments like vacations or holiday plans. If he seems unsure or uncomfortable with the idea of making long-term plans, it could reflect his uncertainty about your relationship’s direction. A guy who knows what he wants will likely have no issue planning ahead, but one who’s undecided may avoid it altogether.